Love and Marriage

Love is so often about where we place our attention and our intention. I created an altar to our marriage this week to celebrate our love and re-ignite the flames of passion.
We have been together for an incredible 19 years this April. We met on Easter weekend in Austin, Texas 2001.
In many ways, it was a resurrection and a new beginning for both of us. We met in the most unlikely of places – in a parking lot as I was about to leave work for the day.
It felt fated from the moment we looked into each other’s eyes. And yet, I would be a liar and a hypocrite if I told you it has always been easy.
The past two years were the hardest and most chaotic of our entire marriage. Things are just now starting to feel harmonious again, and for the first time in a while, we are starting to have new dreams about a future together.
I had what you might call a mid-life crisis, a term that feels shameful somehow, when it shouldn’t be, really, because this is a time when we may start to question everything about our lives in order to find a deeper level of authenticity than we had before.
It was like I had only been living as half a person up until then, as something of a girl child not fully grown up. Other people had been calling all the shots, or most of them at least, and I felt powerless and small.
I felt an emptiness inside that I didn’t know how to fill. It sometimes gave me thoughts of suicide. I knew that something had to change, and so I began searching for answers. I looked high and low – through seminars, gurus, violet flames, and self improvement courses – anything I could get my hands on.
Anthony was going through his own transformation. He had been deeply devastated by the suicide of his best friend, and he was tormented by feelings of guilt and inadequacy. As I was coming into my power, his seemed to be leaving him.
Eventually, we came to understand that the only way to stay together was to grow together. We get excited now to share new and crazy ideas about spirituality or the universe, and that passion is the spark that gives us both hope for the future.

#love #marriage #marriagestory #writers #writing #writingcommunity #valentine #passion #romance #spark #growth #selfimprovement

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